How to stop the iTunes interface sound effects

Ah. Touch screens. They are wondrous, are they not? Then you install iTunes and every time you do anything, you are rewarded by this annoying "pshwip" sound. TL;DR, it's the Page Load Complete sound for iTunes and it apparently activates when it detects any services running that might be used by differently abled peeps. If you don't need it, though, it's really, REALLY annoying. Here's how to turn it off. 

  1. Get to the Windows desktop so you can see the Task Bar (all versions, same thing)
  2. Find the little speaker icon just left of your clock and RIGHT CLICK
  3. Select the SOUNDS option, you'll see the following

See that Page Load Complete item? Select it and pick [NONE] from the picker, then click OK (or Apply and OK if you roll that way*). That's it. Your long, National nightmare will be over... most likely. I guarantee nothing. 

* for the record, clicking OK in a Windows dialog that also includes an Apply button implies the application of settings changes. The Apply button is there in case you want to see the changes before finalizing, that way you don't have to keep opening the settings over and over and over again.